Tuesday, February 14, 2006

I call it "VD" because it's funnier that way

Happy Valentine's Day! I got the ever-annoying question at work today: "You don't have a boyfriend? How is that possible?" Um, thanks, it's great to know I'm so fan-freakin'-tastic that there's got to be something wrong with me being single. I think it's fine, thanks--I've been lonely for a particular person before, but I've never felt the urge simply not to be alone. I know people wouldn't ask that if I were hideous-looking or a nasty person, and that the question is meant to be either comforting, flattering, or flirtatious, but it always tempts me to answer sarcastically, like, "I don't know! Is it the smell?" or "nobody wants to date a girl who's in the process of becoming a man. But wait'll you see me post-surgery!" or "well, I have this temper, you see, and if another dead man shows up in the dumpster behind my building, people are going to start asking questions." Like the time I went to the doctor, and the nurse who admitted me asked what I was using for birth control (as they do, even if you're sitting there holding out your severed toe in a baggie of ice and bleeding on the carpet), and I replied, "If my face doesn't work, my personality will!" and she actually took me seriously and said, "Oh, sweetie! Don't say that, you're lovely!" which made me feel pretty bad, actually, because if it's not patently obvious that I was joking then I must really be repellent, right? In this mood I went to blogthings and saw the quiz, "What do people think of your face?" which I thought would be funnier than it is. In any case, it's in the sidebar now.

In any case, I got a delicious heart-shaped lollipop from Amy at Stitch n Bitch, an email from my other friend Amy directing me here, and I-love-yous from my parents and sister, who are the ones who really count. In fact, I have a package waiting for me at my building's management office, which just may be the traditional chocolates from good ol' Dad. Score!


Ramona said...

Happy Belated Valentines Day!

Anonymous said...

dad rocks so much. i'm so glad he and mom found each other, bla bla bla.

my coworker asked me what matt got me for valentines' day, and i was like, um, nothing...i'm low maintenence