Thursday, June 22, 2006

meme rhymes with dream

...which is what I should be doing right now. 47 hrs of work in 4 days. I'm a supa-stah.
And yet here I am, in front of the computer. I always need a little downtime when I get home. I can't just walk in the door and crash. I need to sit around and be home for a while. So here's my Blue Book Meme, seen at Pomo Golightly and Hedgeblog among other places. The story of my blue book is a little weird. It begins a little over a year ago, when I was doing archaeology in Texas on land owned by a real live honest-to-gosh Texas oil bazillionaire. I swear and declare, he had the hat, the enormous belt buckle, everything; he owns approximately three counties' worth of land; and according to a coworker who'd worked for him before, he once rolled down his truck window while driving across his land, threw out his bottle of Jack Daniels, pointed to the spot where it landed, and said to his henchman (foreman?) in the passenger seat, "I want an oil well right there, tomorrow morning." So let it be written, so let it be done! Well, this bazillionaire is weirdly generous and apparently gives out steak dinners and shots of Jack like there's no tomorrow if you catch him in the right mood. Apparently we didn't, because he gave each and every member of our crew a copy of Don't Throw Away Tomorrow: Living God's Dream for Your Life by Robert H. Schuller, the Hour of Power guy. I hate to criticize this book since, well, I haven't actually read it, but suffice it to say it's not my typical reading material. It's a hardback book and I can't bring myself to just throw it out, but I haven't made a trip to the Goodwill in over a year, either, so it just sits in its blue dust jacket on its appointed place on the floor by my desk, between the file cabinet and the stack of as-yet-unfiled papers. And when I opened it up to do this meme, I discovered the reason he'd given the books to us. They were cheap. About thirty pages are upside-down and backwards, with the edges trimmed weirdly. Thanks for this awesome religious manufacturing defect, Bazillionaire! Anyway, on to the meme.

Closest Blue Book Meme
1. Grab the nearest book with a blue cover.
2. Open the book to page 86.
3. Find the first full paragraph.
4. Post the text in your journal along with these instructions.
5. Don't search around and look for the coolest book you can find, just the closest blue book.

My grandson E**** M**** attended the summer football camp held by his secular high school athletic department. "They had some really strong rules, Grandpa," he told me. "Respect your own body and respect the bodies of others' was the first rule. 'How do you do this?' the coaches asked. The players answered, 'Say no to substance abuse... no to alcohol, drugs, tobacco, and pornography [technically, a substance!]. Say yes to exercise and a healthful diet. Say yes to discipline.'"

Well, all right, so it's actually pretty good advice. I didn't say the book was WRONG, I just would never have bought it for myself. I can sum up my opinions on the pop-psych/self-help/religious genres by stating that I howled (with laughter, but the word "no" was involved too) at Bridget Jones' question, "Can self-help books actually help self?" I'm off to have a bedtime beer now. (Sadly, no accompanying bedtime pornography. Although I hear you can get that stuff on this here internet now!)

2 comments:

saskia said...

haha, funny story, great stuff. but ehm.. what's the definitinon of a 'meme'... I'm dutch, I have an excuse for not knowing (I hope..)

Auntie Maim said...

Nice! Good advice it may be, but the word "healthful" always squicks me out for some reason.